My brother and I were talking the other day and he told me that, during a recent exercise in long-term life planning, he realized that he would turn 40. Let me just tell you that my brother is 28 years old, so he isn't turning 40 soon, but someday. And it hadn't occurred to him before that moment that someday, in a way he can imagine and almost put his finger on, he will turn 40.
I know how he feels.
Let me first say that 40 isn't old. Not by a long shot. No, 80 is old, 90 is old. Forty is somewhere in the middle, but it is older. It is settled and career and mortgage and gradeschoolers. Your 20s are for questioning things, making mistakes, trying new ideas, and setting things up for later. Your 30s are for attending to those mistakes (um, debt, hello!) and seeing some of those earlier plans through...maybe getting married, maybe having a kid, maybe progressing in a career. At least that is what I think the next decade holds for me. OK, so I have the husband and kid already, but we are just getting started. We are just creating our family and figuring out what being a family is. The next decade will solidify all that, make it easier (I hope), and make it better.
But 40...what the hell are your 40s for? I can't even think that far ahead. Maybe they are for enjoying all the hard work that got you to where you are. Maybe they are for getting back to some of the things you gave up in your quest to progress. Maybe they are for knowing who you are and what you want and how to get it. That doesn't seem so bad at all. (Or maybe every decade is the same...now that would suck.)
I am 30, and soon my brother will be 30, and then soon enough we'll both be 40. That is OK. I don't dislike aging. In fact, it is really nice to know that this year is over, the next year is starting, and it holds lots of new and exciting opportunities. We're not getting old, we're getting older. I like getting older. I am kind of a crazy old lady deep down anyway, so why not ring in the new year with that attitude! I will still hate this so-called rock-and-roll the radio insists on playing, I will still go to bed at 9:30pm, and I will still throw rusty cans at the kids who won't get OFF MY LAWN. (Alright, so I made that last one up.)
Happy new year to everyone. May the next year, and all the years after that, be better and brighter than the one before.
1 comment:
So here is what I think 40 is for. It is for launching those kids and reclaiming your identity. You know who you are without all those obligations that have filled your life for decades. When I am 40 my first kiddo will be going to college & my second will be getting ready for college. The nest will be empty by the time I am 48 so that is how I will spend 40. Getting ready to do what I want when I want and having less laundry- I hope.
only 9 1/2 years to go. DOH!
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